We are all familiar with the literary form Haiku. Seventeen syllables divided into three lines: 5,7,5. The following are 5 haikus about food product mascots.
Twinkie the Kid
Oh, Twinkie the Kid
Never saw you shoot a man
But I'll bet you could
Mrs. Butterworth
Your syrup is fab
I pour you on my pancakes
Damn...you're kinda hot
The Jolly Green Giant
One big green fucker
You are in charge of veggies
I won't fuck with you
Cap'n Crunch
Captain, my Captain
You keep the soggies at bay
Then....tear up my mouth
Kool Aid Man
You bring the Kool-Aid
You scream "Oh Yeah!" through the wall
You fucked up my house
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