Updated sporadically! Guaranteed!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

15 Bizarre Responses To The Query "How's It Going?"

In a similar vein to our earlier 15 Things I Have Never Overheard, here are 15 Bizarre Responses To The Query "How's It Going?"

1. I can hear the ants talking. They hate your shirt.

2. Eh, not so great. I've got chancres on my ass and it kills me to sit. But I'm getting by.

3. E Plurbus Unam!

4. Much better since I passed those stones.

5. OK. But quick question...if you are really lonely and horny and you stick your dick into the soil of a potted fern...but only on one occasion....that doesn't make you a Dendrophiliac does it?

6. Once when I was really hungry, I ate a hobo. I figured nobody would miss him. Plus, I was really hungry.

7. Pretty good. I've been studying some ancient Asian arts. Would you like to help me feng shui the contents of my pants?

8. I've been better. Last night I lost my keys in a stray dog's rectum and I've been locked out of my apartment ever since.

9. Is it weird to get really turned on by Strawberry Shortcake dolls?

10. Do you ever measure your penis on a day by day basis to see if it is getting bigger through sheer force of will? I think mine is shrinking. I must be doing it wrong.

11. Would you be interested in joining my adult all-nude tee ball team?

12. Can I see your dick for a minute? I just want to check something.

13. Man...your ear is totally fuckable.

14. Do you have any really good recipes for Platypus? I got like five of them and I need to do something with them before they turn bad.

15. Man, I partied so hard last night I woke up this morning in bed with two porcupines, a dead duck, a half empty box of Wheaties and no hair on my balls. Oh, and some really ugly broad. I mean really ugly.

Comments :

0 comments to “15 Bizarre Responses To The Query "How's It Going?"”

Post a Comment

Related Posts with Thumbnails